The Bounty Hunter

Someone, preferably a friend or, heck, maybe even her agent, really needs to sit Jennifer Aniston down and have the talk. Y'know, the one where they tell her she's a really sweet girl and she has her shit together and she's super cute. Get her all smiling and gushing "oh, stop," while playfully slapping your hand. And then, just lay it on the table: honey, you need to stop doing movies. I know, it's harsh, but let's break it down:


TV career:
Friends - that says it all. She was fantastic on Friends.
South Park - very funny as Mrs. Stevens the Choir Teacher
King of Hill - again, funny stint as Pepporoni Sue
30 Rock - by far her funniest and most brilliant role since Friends. Yeah, she nailed it.

Movie Career:
Office Space - she was flaretastic.
Rock Star - definitely not a star. More like a flicker.
Along Came Polly - along came my finger to hit fast forward.
Derailed - a definite train wreck. I so wanted to like this one, too, because of Clive Owen.
Rumor Has It - yes, rumor had it that you were one of the top paid actresses. That didn't last long.
Love Happens - so doesn't anger, especially after watching this movie (I'm sure).

So, to sum it up: I do like Jen. I do. But, seriously, she needs to maybe consider a TV role again and get out of the movies. Maybe she can join her BFF Courtney on Cougar Town. I don't know how or why that show is doing so well (I have yet to see it), but maybe she could play a Puma. Oh, wait, never mind. That's the name of one of her upcoming movies.